A Perfect Version of Myself

Losing Weight is Hard

No Way Out February 14, 2009

Filed under: Uncategorized — Tara @ 9:42 am
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My sister sent me TWO sets of flowers today!  One was for Valentines Day and the other was because she’s proud of me trying to lose weight.  She’s so sweet.

It got me thinking about family support.  I live with my grandmother (it’s a very long story) who is just as committed to me being healthier and losing weight as I am.  Nanny told me the other day that she had been getting very concerned for my health before I started making changes.  I really had no idea that anyone besides me did that, but she told me that she used to hear me climb the stairs with my laundry and it would really freak her out how much I huffed and puffed. 

While it was nice to hear that someone was concerned about me, it made me feel terrible that I scared a 73 year old woman every time I went up and down the stairs.  I should have done something like this years ago and I really don’t know why I didn’t.

Was it because it was too hard?  Cause I think it’s hard now, but I’m still doing it.  It makes me mad at myself that I let it get this bad.  If I had’ve gone on a diet and STUCK to it a few years ago, I would have so much less weight to lose!  Plus my body would be stronger from not carrying around 300+ lbs for all these extra years!  If I had’ve lost this weight when I was younger, I wouldn’t have had the years of humiliation that comes with being severely obese…like the time I had my tonsils out (I was 24, I know that’s weird) and my doctors office scale couldn’t weigh me.  My doctor wrote that I was over 300 lbs on the pre-op sheet and just left it at that.  When I went for the surgery, the nurse there weighed me on the big scale and gave me a lecture on my weight in front of an entire room of people.  I wanted to die.

I wish I could figure out why things like this didn’t make me spring into action!

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One Response to “No Way Out”

  1. kristisummer Says:

    I had my tonsils out at 24 too, and it was pure hell. Could of should of would of the point is you are doing something about it now and it is never too late. So you should be proud that you have chose this life change.


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