A Perfect Version of Myself

Losing Weight is Hard

Vow July 13, 2010

Filed under: Goals and Expectations,Weight Loss Updates — Tara @ 10:28 pm
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The train wreck of Saturday’s chicken-wing fiasco proved out in a 1.4 lb gain.  I’m honestly surprised it’s not more.

Want to know what’s weird?

I’m revved.  I’m pumped.  I feel…exhilirated by the idea of weight loss for the first time in a long time.

See, this weird thing happens when you are no longer out of shape and super fat.  When every pound lost no longer takes you a step closer to a real life and a step further from death.  When you can shop in regular stores, in single digit sizes and look awesome in most everything you try on.

You stop trying so hard.

I mean, sure, I was still watching what I was eating.  I was still exercising daily (sometimes twice, I love you Yoga!).  But, when someone offered me a cupcake or a chicken wing, I was taking it.  I was nibbling more than I should have and I was cruising more in “maintenance” mode than weight loss mode.

It stops now.

I’m determined to get these last 12 lbs off.  I mean, DETERMINED.  I want them gone by my birthday (my 29th!) on September 21st.  It’s ten weeks away, so that will mean losing 1.2 lbs per week on average.  My current rate of loss is nowhere near that, but I’m determined to kick it into high gear and say goodbye to those pounds forever.  I can do this!  I can absolutely do this.

Here’s my plan (come on, by now you knew I had to have one):  I’m going old-school and back to basics.  Positive self-talk.  Positive reinforcement.  Hardcore belief in myself.  No more looking beyond the end of the day.  And most importantly: no more binges.  I’m stronger than that and I’m better than that.

I have some ideas for how I’m going to handle the binge eating that’s become more of an issue lately.  I’m going to employ all the tricks I used to use to head it off: brush my teeth when I feel the need to keep eating, leave the house and walk around the block when I feel the need to keep eating, phone a friend, reach out via Twitter or do anything necessary to distract myself for the fifteen minutes or so it usually takes to head off the start of a binge.

If I’m really TRULY hungry, I’m going to stop feeling guilty for reaching into my Activity Points.  I’ve earned them and I should use them if I need them – not to binge, but to eat when hungry.

I’m going to have a great week this week.  It’s going to be binge-free and I’m going to post a loss at the scale next week.  I believe this all to be true.  To that end, I’m going to blog daily here (yikes, never promised that before).  They probably won’t be deep or insightful, more daily check-ins with how things are going.  I’m going to hold myself accountable and I’m going to get through this.  I’m going to be a Weight Watchers Member-At-Goal by the time I see my next birthday.

You can take that to the bank.

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One Response to “Vow”

  1. I *love* the excitement of this post! You sound totally determined and committed, and I know you will reach your goal by your b-day!


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